4 Finding Your Path

In this conversation, Vera Rivera explores the journey of personal growth, the challenges of setting and achieving goals, and the importance of self-reflection. She discusses the distractions that can derail us from our paths, the significance of tracking financial habits, and the need to embrace our inner strengths. Vera emphasizes the power of perspective shifts in overcoming fear and encourages listeners to share their stories of growth and self-discovery.

• The journey towards goals often involves distractions and pivots.
• Perfectionism is an unattainable goal that can hinder progress.
• Recognizing financial patterns is crucial for growth.
• Self-reflection helps in understanding personal achievements.
• Tracking progress can change the perception of success.
• Finding your voice is essential for personal empowerment.
• Shifting perspectives can alleviate the pressure of expectations.
• Embracing inner strengths is key to overcoming fear.
• Everyone is constantly evolving and losing parts of themselves.
• Sharing personal stories can inspire others on their journeys.

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Podcast sound design by Myles Lumbab 

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP86us2ry/

🔥 “You don’t owe anyone the watered-down version of yourself.”

Transcript

Vera Rivera (00:00)
We're back to where we originally started on this topic of looking back at your life. How often have you been derailed or distracted or shoved a different way or had to pivot away from a goal that you had originally set? I don't know about you, but I literally feel like I've done this.

hundreds of thousands of times in the last few years just getting easily distracted and in this mindset of I guess like the grass is always greener on the other side type of thinking or like maybe there's an easier better way to get this done or let me go ahead and do some research before I start and that way I have all the knowledge in the world and then I can start.

or the thought that maybe starting is just where you need to start to get to that specific goal. I found that in my journey to pursuing perfectionism, that's like an impossible goal, because perfect is not attainable and

In 30-ish years of living, I believe that I've tried to accomplish that and failing miserably at it, but also not forgetting that I've achieved so many things that are way more than where I first started. And I think that's where this whole thing...

is going to take a turn because I've realized that I've been looking at the end goal so much throughout the years that I've forgotten the journey through and leading up to these goals. Mind you, my goals are my own perspective, my own personal goals, my own ideals, my own

story, my own everything, right? So my goal, say, is to have a million dollars in my bank account by the time that I'm 40, then I would be able to live a comfortable life.

looking back and just tracking. I am still nowhere near that goal, but I have two choices. I could sit in the place where I'm feeling crappy about not meeting this goal and down on myself and looking at all the things I did wrong and looking at different ways I can change my methods or what I need to cut out of my life.

or reprioritize or maybe cut the goal to a smaller one like $500,000 in my savings by the time I'm 40 or I could do the latter and I can look at where I started and say that compared to when I knew zero about money and just literally had this addiction to spending my money like period.

Like, I basically learned to work for a paycheck, spend the paycheck, and work some more for the next paycheck. And essentially, yes, that's living paycheck to paycheck. But at a certain point when you're doing the same thing and seeing the same patterns and not making any changes, you get into...

the concept of insanity and that nothing is going to change until you change something. So the pattern here was not tracking any money, working your ass off, getting a paycheck, work hard, play hard mentality, and doing it all over again after spending that paycheck and playing really hard. So.

One thing that really changed for me financially, and this is just one example of the many that I have for all of the goals that I've set for myself as a recovering, people pleasing, over high achiever is...

starting to track my money and where it's going. First off, tracking what is incoming, understanding what actually needs to be maintained and prioritized, knowing where the money is going, and understanding whether or not I am living within my means or below my means or above my means. And

It makes a huge difference. What I've found, just really briefly as I go off this tangent, is that I actually made a lot of money. Two, I had no idea where my money was going.

therefore I felt like I was broke and a failure and wasn't making any money. I just didn't see where it was going. But looking back, I started out as... I hate to admit this, but as soon as I turned 18, I got my very first credit card. I maxed out my first credit card. And then as an 18 year old, I felt like such a responsible adult that I went to a car dealership and...

purchased a used car and got a loan for whatever I can get a loan for for this car to come home and tell Jason and my dad I went and bought a car and they were like what the fuck Vera this car doesn't even have four identical tires you totally got taken advantage of but here I was sitting really proud of myself because I did something

But essentially what I did was spend and blow all of the money and I learned zero lessons and honestly as an older child adult trying to be this adulting person.

There are still some patterns that I'm noticing that I still have and need to work on. But we've come a really long way from that version of me that just loved getting all of this credit, knowing that I had all of this credit, and then going out and blowing it as soon as I could figure out what I could blow the money on.

So what we're doing here is really taking you away from going all in on the idea that you're a failure because you are not at your ideal goal.

and going and taking a step back and reflecting on what you've actually accomplished. Because when you think about it and take a step back, this 18 year old version of myself is different than this current version of myself. And when I'm looking at a timeline and gauging from start to finish, like where this is, or like where I lie in this like timeframe, I

would say I'm probably almost halfway to my goal.

And I say that because I actually have all of the resources and knowledge and education to be able to track where my money is going and what's coming in and how to control that. But I also have inconsistencies with doing my daily budget and understanding where my money goes on a daily basis, mainly because of old patterns and habits that I still have right in my face, like

constant emails that I shouldn't be subscribed to that tell me that there's a huge deal on something and I feel like I'm getting a good deal so then I'll like buy the thing right? I don't know if any of you are like this but I also scroll through say like TikTok or Instagram and I see these ads and they sound amazing and I am a trial and error type of person so I need to figure something out.

on my own first before anything. Like, no matter what you tell me, I will buy the thing and I will try it out to see if I love it or hate it or prove that you're wrong only to say that you are right. And there is, there probably is fixing that, but that's a whole nother tangent because you actually can change your mind within minutes and change your neural pathways. It's science, but coming back to topic.

I have definitely earned way more in my lifetime currently than I have before. And that says a lot because there's been an increase in my income through the years. I've...

purchased a home, I've got so much knowledge and resources

I can't keep myself in this mindset that I'm a failure and walk forward in life in that way because it's just depressing. And...

with a flip of a switch, you can go from a mindset of, I'm failing and not nearly at my goal to look at what I've accomplished and let's just keep going because regardless, that million dollar goal by 40 is probably impossible. I have no idea because I'm not there yet, but I also know that as long as I'm not staying in the same place,

and making some progress that that is saying something. We're getting closer to the goal and we're not stopping and quitting, right? We're still making progress towards the goal, even if it's just the one thing that we're doing and focusing on to move forward and continue to make strides. So I just want you to go into this day.

really just noticing that even though this all stemmed because I was thinking about the reason that I even started this podcast because I was already beside myself on how I'm not showing up the way that I told myself that I was going to show up, which also isn't in alignment with my energy type and how I wanted to show up naturally and authentically. So.

It started with that whole entire thought process. what I'm getting to is Wild Truth Wild Heart is a whole entire universe that has so many things. It's part of a huge vision that is deep within my heart. I'm so passionate about it. But she found herself, the podcast originally was created with the intention of being able to share stories of

finding and losing yourself throughout the year is as you are becoming, right? So you become an adult, you become this teenager, you become this girlfriend, you become a wife, you become a mother, you become the CEO of a company, you become a leader within a company, you become an author, whatever it is.

You're constantly becoming different versions of you and also losing other parts of you and it's a back and forth movement. But all in the same, you're becoming this person that has started in one place and is working in strides little by little to this bigger goal.

And she found herself podcast was created.

for the stories of women to come up and tell the story of how they became who they are today and what led them there in hopes that it inspires you, the listener, to continue working on the tiny little goals to get to know yourself better, figure out and master your systems.

find what lights you up and to be able to share your story and inspire other women to do the same who are stuck in the places where they've lost themselves. Because we've all been there and we're all experiencing this life and moving through these milestones and nobody gives you a handbook for any of it. And that's what she found herself the podcast.

was originally intended for. But it's also becoming an outlet for these rifts where an idea just comes into mind and I can speak about it. And one thing that I personally have been working on is exercising my voice and using my voice and not being afraid to speak up and

And I say this because I know that you see this person who shows up on social media, who can speak, who can speak in front of rooms of hundreds of people and who's trained and worked and helped tons of people with getting to where they want to be. But at the same time, a lot of what I know has been

taught to me and it's what I've learned and what I've also learned is I'm really great at giving everybody except for myself praise. I'm really great at shouting out one of my friends for the amazing job that she did in her master class or a program that she has coming out or ways that someone else can help you capitalize and win at life.

But when it comes to myself, my offers, and what I do, I, for the life of me, cannot speak it. And it's something I've been practicing, because I know deep within my soul that this is what I'm supposed to do. granted, once you know your design, your purpose, and what your chart tracks based on your whole entire

creation and purpose on this earth. It's so insane. I'm gonna tell you mine and it's to be the first to go fearless and like damn seriously, that's a lot of pressure. But another perspective shift and I've been working my muscle of self-awareness for years now since around COVID when I first

started working with mentors and coaches and starting to realize like patterns and getting to know myself on a deeper level and how psychology works and all of the things. But the perspective shift is priceless because there are so many different ways that you can look at something. You're either failing or succeeding in something and it doesn't matter what it is. It really just matters your perspective and take on it and how you're looking at it.

The perspective shift as far as feeling the pressure, like I was saying, I was feeling all of this pressure and heaviness about how I have to be the first to go forward and to speak up. But one of my mentors gave me this perspective shift of what if you were already created and equipped to step forward and be this fearless person who goes first? Like what if...

I'm the one holding myself back from even actually

having the truth revealed to me that I'm already equipped with the skills and the gifts and strengths to be the first to move forward. And I was like, my goodness, I've been putting a cap on myself for all of these years and being so afraid to step forward and be fearless.

when it literally was just a shift.

But what I know to be true is regardless of who you believe in, what you put your faith in, whether it's God or the universe or spirit or the angels or your guides, whatever it may be, those dreams and seeds were planted in you for a reason.

Another thing biblically that I heard of as another perspective shift is the fact that if we were made in God's image and we believe that we aren't enough or we're lacking, then it's basically a slap in God's face for us to not show up and step into ⁓

the person with these gifts and strengths and abilities because we're too afraid to do it or we're thinking that we're lacking Everything that I've heard and believe and that gets brought up to me all the time is that you are already perfectly made and equipped for every single obstacle and thing that you have

gone through. Like if you're going through something, you literally are already equipped.

to kill it. And the fact that...

You're not going out there and killing the game.

is an insult to the higher power that

just wants you to succeed and like you already have what you need inside of you. Like I believe that I've had to have that line like reiterated to me five billion times already but every single time that I hear it it's a great like instillment that yes this is the path this is the way this is

what it is.

I'm at this point now where it's like who cares?

because I'm literally just here living my best life and

We're just gonna do the thing.

But yeah, I hope that this helped you today. I hope that you share it. If you feel like it needs to be shared, I hope that you share it. And I hope that you stick around if you have anything that you want to like talk about or go over, or if you love to like be a guest on the podcast ⁓ and tell your story of how you found yourself and.

how you got to where you are today, then I would love to have you send me a message directly. ⁓ Yeah, thank you for listening and for being here and I hope you have an amazing day.